To me the following observations stand out: Their lyrics are bland and uninspired. The music is derivative and self-indulgent. Apparently they believe masturbatory riffs and solos are somehow to equal music. The singer is just plain awful. Where did they find that guy? Their look... anyone for D&D? The last point is not significant in terms of music. Honestly, I don't care what people look like if they can create something that captivates me. But there's this vibe of "trying too hard" that probably further taints my view of the band as a whole. The singer on the other hand ... what to say? He reminds me of that episode of South Park where Timmy becomes the lead singer for "Lords of the Underworld". I almost feel too sorry for the guy to make fun of him. Almost. And Jordan Rudess? Dude, the keytar. Wow, just wow. Apparently the pitch bend switch is the new whammy bar, eh? Guitar solos on a keyboard are not impressive, and above all sound like ass. If you want to play a guitar, why not just play a fucking guitar? One instrument masquerading as another is just sad. Dream Theater is what happens when a bunch of professional music instructors listen to Return to Forever once too many, and so decide to get together and start a band to show off how bad-ass their licks are. And to me, that's what Dream Theater's "music" is: a collection of riffs to showcase their individual talents, occasionally punctuated by the shrill and off-key warbling of their deranged front man. Through this mess of sounds, I have completely failed to hear any real music.