S.O.S. (Save an Old Sonofab*tchprintingmachinefromHell)

Dear all,

I found a Canon BJS-265SP printer. It looks small and old (and old it is), but let this fool you not: its powers of mental pain and destruction are as strong as they ever were!

I was (still am) in desperate need of a printer, and found this one lurking in the shadows of a cupboard, in the place I'm renting now.

It is loaded with a functional cartridge.
I connected it to a Windows XP laptop through a newly-bought Parallel-to-USB cable.
I installed the required driver.
The printer is detected by the cpu, and everything seems to be just fine.

EXCEPT THAT: the printer keeps on blinking its evil green single eye, non-stop, from the moment I turn it on (with or without cpu connection).
No tasks in the waiting list, of course.
If I try printing anything (or sending any other task), a few minutes go by with no reaction, and I eventually get a nondescript error message ("Error occurred, launch the Printers & Fax troubleshooting, or else just go die, we don't care" ). The Windows troubleshooting, predictably, is of no help whatsoever.

WHAT SHOULD I DO?!!
(assuming I have too little budget to go buy a new machine)

Please help me bring back to life (at least for a while) this monstrous antiquity, for which I can't even find a user's manual anywhere.
All assistance is welcome!


Cheers,
Dorian